Review – Temper
Background
I originally wrote Temper for two reasons.
Temper
One, I wanted to introduce a way into a vague idea I had for a Star Trek fan fiction time travel series. And two, I wanted to not only continue the story of Doug, Lili, Malcolm, Melissa and Leonora, but I wanted the kids to be older without aging Lili and Doug quite so much. After all, Doug is fifty-five when he meets Lili. Therefore, he would be in his sixties for any stories where the children could really interact and be an integral part of the plot. But a time travel story could rather neatly fix all of that.
Beyond that, I also wanted a way to continue the saga of the Empress Hoshi Sato and her son, Jun, the son of time traveler Richard Daniels. Furthermore, I wanted more kids in the royal family. For the Empress, it would be a Machiavellian move – she would have several children of different fathers, thereby diversifying genetically and, perhaps, given the tenderhearted paternal feelings that go along with the Y Chromosome Skew, she would get the male members of her senior staff to keep her alive, at least until her children reached the age of majority. And in Temper, they are just about all there.
Plot
The story begins with a snapshot into how the arrangement among Malcolm, Lili, Doug, Melissa and Leonora really works. Doug and Melissa are out hunting linfep, and then perrazin, with phase bows. Malcolm and Lili are going on vacation to Fep City. And the children are either with Leonora or are being cared for by Yimar. The occasion is that Melissa wants to have another baby.
But then Malcolm must return to the Enterprise, and Lili comes home early. Time Traveler Richard Daniels arrives and tells her that he needs Doug for something. She’s not so sure she believes him, and is a bit peeved that he’s landed his ship, the brand-new HG Wells, right on top of her day lilies. In order to fix this, he adds a drop of his blood to the soil but does not tell her that it’s spiked with stem cell growth accelerator.
Rick Steps In
When Doug and Melissa get in, and Malcolm is reached via communicator and Leonora arrives separately, Rick tells them why he needs Doug – the Empress is experimenting with what’s called a pulse shot. She’s looking to get over to our side of the pond, because she thinks that she can get more ships like the ISS Defiant.
But her few attempts are clumsy, and they wreak havoc with time itself, causing breaks in 2166 and 2161, including people from our universe crossing over to the Mirror and being trapped there (this includes the three eldest children, Joss, Marie Patrice and Tommy). Rick’s best information is on 2166, so he needs that part repaired first. Doug is the logical choice because, being from the Mirror originally, he sports a radiation band that matches that universe. Lili is chosen to accompany him because she’s considered non-threatening and, with false calloo tattoos on her arms and legs, she can pass for a Calafan. Rick explains that he cannot go as the Mirror government of his time period forbids it. This is due to the debacle about the siring of his son, Jun, which is explained in First Born.
Once Doug and Lili cross over, they find a totalitarian regime and just what’s going on with their children.
Music
Temper is less musically-driven than Together, but that makes sense as it is more of an adventure tale than a love story. However, there are still individual themes.
- Rick’s theme is The Records – Your Starry Eyes
- Malcolm’s theme is Paul Young – Every Time You Go Away
- Doug’s theme is Dog’s Eye View – Everything Falls Apart
- Jun’s theme is Edwyn Collins – A Girl Like You
- Kirin’s theme is the Fine Young Cannibals – She Drives Me Crazy
- Arashi’s theme is Pink Floyd – Money
- Takeo’s theme is Cracker – Get off This
- Takara’s theme is Tori Amos – God
- Izo’s theme is U2 – The Fly
- Joss’s theme is Joy Division – Love Will Tear Us Apart
- Marie Patrice’s theme is Sinead O’Connor – I Want Your Hands on Me
- Tommy’s theme is Green Day – When I Come Around
- DR’s theme is The Cure – Why Can’t I Be You?
- Charlie’s theme is Warren Zevon – Trouble Waiting to Happen
- The baseball game is evoked with John Fogerty – Centerfield
- Empress Hoshi’s theme is ELO – Evil Woman
- Lili’s theme is Blind Melon – Tones of Home
- Arroz con Leche is a Spanish lullaby. Here, it is sung by José Feliciano.
Story Postings
- Temper on Ad Astra (contains reviews)
- Temper on Fanfiction.net
- also Temper on Fictionpad
- Temper on Wattpad
- and Temper on the G & T Show forums
- Temper in In Between Days context
- and Temper in Times of the HG Wells context
- Temper in Hall of Mirrors context
Rating
The story is rated M.
Upshot
I like, for the most part, how the story turned out, but it is deeper into my universe. Therefore, it can be a confusing read for someone who is not fully familiar with works that cover the earlier time periods. I do make an effort to create stand-alone stories, but I believe that the effect was somewhat mixed here. Temper is usually on the lower end of read counts for the first five big books (Reversal, Intolerance, Together, and Fortune are the other four), along with Intolerance, but in the case of Intolerance, it’s because it’s a shorter book. I suspect that Temper is a bit harder to get into. A pity, as it’s the lead-in for the HG Wells stories.
[…] story that takes place after Fortune. I also added a dream story taking place between Together and Temper, […]
[…] Temper […]
[…] her siblings, Marie Patrice spends some time in the Mirror Universe, during Temper. But an actual counterpart is […]
[…] 2162, not too long after the events of Temper and Fortune, and Andrew Miller is calling for bets for a mirror baseball game as catcher David […]
[…] back in Temper, I established that each universe vibrates on a particular radiation band. We would be 21 […]
[…] story in the same way that Reversal is Lili‘s story, Together is Melissa‘s, Temper is Doug‘s and Fortune is Leonora‘s, but it’s also very much Pamela‘s story […]
[…] originally arrived in Temper (I named him Craig, and then I wanted that first name for Craig Willets), and in the Mirror […]
[…] many canon characters who didn’t even have a first name. I first brought him into my fanon in Temper, and I liked him so much that I decided he should really have his own series. I named that series […]
[…] species called the Derellian bat. This bat has been in all sorts of places – in Reversal, Temper, Throwing Rocks at Looking Glass Houses and Intolerance, just to name a […]
[…] and then create any number of others in order to generate more plot ideas, including the idea for Temper, a story that really doesn’t work without Together as its foundation. Furthermore, any number […]
[…] meal. It’s made clear, very quickly (and hearkens back to the same conditions in Reveral and Temper in particular), that MU food is bad, and the fact that there is bread is a minor miracle. Quietly, […]
[…] the time of First Born and Temper, Aidan’s humiliation is complete, and he is used to accepting abusive orders, all in the name […]
[…] for Richard. They check each other out in A Lesson and then are introduced at the start of Temper. But at the end of A Long, Long Time Ago, he ends it, although he contacts her a few times, during […]
[…] Together, their relationship is challenged, and it finally comes to an understanding in Temper and then in Fortune. Doug and Lili have two children, Jeremiah Logan (known as Joss) and Marie […]
[…] Temper, he ends up caring for Blair, and the implication is that it might be for a reason other than […]
[…] Together, and Rellie, from Temper. Perhaps just as oddly is the fact that I have written more fully realized female characters for […]
[…] Charles Tucker VI, is a success to Empress Hoshi, and becomes the Emperor Charles I, as is noted in Temper and Who Shall Wear the Robe and […]
[…] In Together, I briefly mention perrazin and described them as big, blond buffalo. By the time of Temper, I wanted to start that book with a hunting scene, so it was time to show […]
[…] Reversal, and then in Temper, the concept of two universes and crosses between them, comes to the fore. There has to be some […]
[…] The Commission and its dealings are, of course, at the center of the doings in the Times of the HG Wells series, but the reader’s first glimpse of my vision of the TIC is in Temper. […]
[…] (the plural does not have an S) are vegetarians, and are the subjects of a hunt with phase bows in Temper. Melissa and Doug – the hunters – have to be quiet when approaching these shy creatures. A […]
[…] Temper, it’s revealed that perrazin will eat olowa and, while hunting, Melissa climbs an olowa tree […]
[…] Temper, in the first temporal dislocation, he loses his life with a lot of other people from both […]
[…] Temper, the Empress Hoshi Sato has her Science Ensign Lucy Stone, with the help of Vulcan slaves […]
[…] children, Izo is also dangerous, and grows up to run the Empress’s secret police. In Temper, in the first alternate timeline, he stays out of the fight for Marie Patrice Beckett but he does […]
[…] the wedge it has forced between him and his friend, Ethan. And in the Mirror Universe, in both the Temper first alternate timeline and in the prime timeline, he shows a loyalty and devotion to his mother […]
[…] Bat has been in a number of places, and is known in both the prime universe and the mirror. In Temper, the bat is seen in Cyril Morgan‘s Sick Bay. The bat makes appearances in Fortune, Day of the […]
[…] with the failed connection in Reversal and then the achieved one in Together. And then when I wrote Temper, I hit upon the ending as it dovetailed with the plot. And that’s how Declan came to be. Even […]
[…] the first alternate timeline in Temper, Marie Patrice takes a passing interest as she is trying to get both Jun and Kira jealous. But […]
[…] and smart, Kira is possibly the most sympathetic of the royal children as they are depicted in Temper. He cares about Marie Patrice, and is her choice, but she is also a social climber and so she […]
[…] as a sweet toddler, very Mommy-centric and very, very bereft when Lili and Doug are kidnapped. For Temper, I saw him as a teenager and then, in Fortune, and in some of the HG Wells stories, such as He […]
[…] Reversal and Together continue climbing. Intolerance exceeded 10,000 overall reads on January 7th. Temper has fewer overall reads but has received more attention at Ad Astra than Intolerance has. Oddly […]
[…] in Temper, it is Malcolm and Lili who are reading the book together, and are discussing it. It’s […]
[…] Empress Hoshi’s third-born is a whiz at numbers and collects the taxes in the Terran Empire. Arashi is probably the most feared, and is most likely to become a 1984-style tyrant (fortunately, he never comes to power) (Temper). […]
[…] at all is because Aidan has been injured enough that Phlox keeps him in Sick Bay overnight. In Temper, the war is again interrupted as Malcolm, Jonathan and Tripp need to work to protect the NX-01 from […]
[…] Temper […]
[…] in the Temper alternate timelines, he is not seen working in the kitchen. Is he dead? Absent from the ship? […]
[…] Temper, he even refers to himself as “the action guy”. Hence he is the one chosen for the […]
[…] But she remembers him, and refers to him as “Soldier Boy”, years later, during the first alternate timeline in Temper. […]
[…] best example of this is in the HG Wells stories. As Temper makes clear, the sole canon character is Richard Daniels. Richard needs a support team, which […]
[…] Eleanor is also incredibly lonely at the beginning of the HG Wells stories and, most likely, during Temper as well, which is something of a prequel to that series and serves as one of the bridges from In […]
[…] the time of the alternate timeline recounted in Temper, the food on the ISS Defiant is little better than slop. And in the history as described by Doug in […]
[…] takes Joss and Marie Patrice to a zoo here (Temper). In the alternate timeline, the initial home base of operations for the mirror universe to get a […]
[…] On Fanfiction.net, I finished spooling out Intolerance and began to post Together. Once Together is finished, I’ll probably fill in some more of my K- and K+-rated backlog before tackling Temper. […]
[…] On Fanfiction.net, I added The Conspiracy, Voice of the Common Man, and Temper. […]
[…] Temper […]
[…] bows come in several sizes. In Temper, it’s revealed that there’s a smaller size for women. In Fortune, it’s revealed […]
[…] he’s not totally gone from my writings. But I do try to write him with angst (Together, Temper, and Fortune) or at least a feeling that he’d rather look at an engine than talk or think […]
[…] makes her first appearance in Intolerance. By the time of Temper, Malcolm reveals to Lili that Pamela (in an alternate timeline) has become the doctor, if not the […]
[…] Because aliens need to eat, they need food animals. In Reversal, I established that the Mirror Universe members of the Defiant‘s crew often go hunting, as the rations there are so bad. The idea is enlarged upon in Fortune. Hence they had to have something they could hunt. A hunt is even shown (although it’s in our universe) as the opening scene in Temper. […]
[…] Temper, and in Fortune, it’s established that he is at least a descendant of Lili and Malcolm, but […]
[…] Temper (this is an alternate future of 2178), he plays third base on the Empress’s baseball team and […]
[…] life in the mirror is far tougher. In Temper, in both the primary timeline and in one of the alternates, he is shown as ending up with the […]
[…] you learn the least about her, and that’s by design. Of the five big books in that series, Temper and Fortune have the most information about her, and even then she’s really just a […]
[…] Together, he helps Deborah Haddon pick up the pieces and they begin dating. By the time of Temper, she’s proposed to him, and they are married by the time of Fortune. During the initial […]
[…] in the mirror universe is a very different animal – and animal is a good word to describe him. In Temper, Empress Hoshi reveals that, in the initial alternate timeline, he was the leader of the first […]
[…] efficient and greedy, he doesn’t want to pay for anything, and wants a cut of everything. In Temper, even as a toddler, he is fascinated by […]
[…] the alternate timelines in Temper, Yimar takes on the High Priestess role (she doesn’t do this in the prime universe, in the […]
[…] As a successor character in Star Trek fanfiction, I needed someone who would have a head for business. That led directly to Neil, although he started off as a somewhat troubled teen, within the alternate timeline as played out in Temper. […]
[…] up a little rise and likes the view. Sharp-eyed readers will recall how the rise fits in with both Temper and Fortune. However, the realtor, a native Calafan, tells him that the land up the rise is […]
[…] injections, which leave her dreamless and comatose. But in the alternate timeline brought about in Temper, the Mirror Polloria is temporarily freed, as Empress Hoshi has essentially opened up the […]
[…] 7, 2161, in the Mirror Universe, the Empress confines Aidan to quarters. It’s just before Temper, and the Empress Hoshi Sato is looking to get her act in gear and start pushing to get more […]
[…] future (after all, that is a universe with multiple extinctions, including giraffes, as is noted in Temper), I can see him as being more sophisticated. It is also unlikely that he would be Pope or a […]
[…] order to resolve the issues in Temper and bring everyone back to the correct side of the pond, I needed for there to be some way to […]
[…] Temper, it is revealed that the choice works for the child (Izo) but Travis is not allowed to enjoy the […]
[…] Malcolm’s was in Intolerance, Melissa’s was in Together and Doug’s was in Temper. Therefore, this story would be assigned to […]
[…] On the G & T Show forums, I posted Conversations With Heroes. On Wattpad, I posted Temper. […]
[…] inadvertent time travel occurs because the errant pulse shot from Empress Hoshi (and the Temper story) hits Wesley and Geordi’s […]
[…] else in Temper seems to have gotten a theme song except for […]
[…] Temper, when Travis is killed, Hoshi taps Andrew to take his place. When Andy meets Melissa for the first […]
[…] Temper, the only intelligent way to get Lili onto the Defiant was for her to be disguised as a Calafan […]
[…] lecturing. I was pleased to be able to dovetail the story well with Rick meeting Tina and the Temper story […]
[…] First of all, on the G & T Show forums, I started to post Temper. […]
[…] a screeching halt and I won’t have a good way to check them. By making this change, Temper was left unfinished on that site. And as of the writing of this blog post, the replacement does not […]
[…] Fanfiction.net, Concord exceeded 1,000 reads before the 25th. Temper made it to 10,000 reads on Ad Astra. Ohio, A Long, Long Time Ago, More Than a Will to Live and Take […]
[…] Temper […]
[…] Wattpad, I finished posting Temper and added Coveted Commodity to In Between […]
[…] relationship, but also to attempt to resolve some of the unfinished business in Intolerance, Temper, and […]
[…] vacation in Fep City at the start of Temper, Malcolm and Lili talk about earlier days, and he hearkens back to that same day during Reversal, […]
[…] the alternate timeline in Temper, she is the spiritual leader of her people on both sides of the pond. When the timeline is […]
[…] also sings, but she’s not a professional. In Together, she sings O Pato to Joss. Then in Temper, she sings Arroz con Leche to Tommy. In Fortune, she sings La Petite Poule Grise to Declan. And in […]
[…] Yimar is given a small bracelet, prefiguring the Cuff of Lo gift in Friday Visit, Together, and Temper, and the bracelet for Melissa in Fortune. Chelben, who is still a rather small child, is given a […]
[…] not mind killing Empress Hoshi, the cabal’s real thoughts are of escape. So as a prelude to Temper, Lucy and Chip mention that an attempt is going to be made to cross over to what we call the Prime […]
[…] Temper […]
[…] I decided the judges would be Jonathan, Malcolm and Jay, thereby prefiguring Lili’s relationship with Malcolm and her connection to Jay, plus her failed connection, during the first E2 alternate timeline, with Jonathan. The food, too, would prefigure some things, including the smoky cumin which is referenced in Temper. […]
[…] I added the following stories to context – A Long, Long Time Ago; Ohio, Fortune and Temper. I also added The Point is Probably Moot. For the Transitions challenge, I wrote the Mirror […]
[…] the old time travel series, things also began with Temper. After some of the initial reintroduction of the arrangement and the five people in it, the action […]
[…] successfully romances her. That relationship continues in Waiting. Lili even asks about it during Temper when she’s asking Malcolm about the gossip from the ship. Malcolm informs Lili that things […]
[…] In Pacing and The Gift, Doug works on making a home for Lili. That home is being added to in Temper. In Fortune, Malcolm realizes he needs to do something similar. However, because he has less of a […]
[…] first shows up in Reversal (injectible form), then in Intolerance (gas), then in Temper (naturally occurring), then in Fortune (tablet), then in Escape and The Point is Probably Moot […]
[…] in Temper, in the first alternate timeline, and has been brought in as one of José Torres‘s […]
[…] a total of nine men (eight Calafans and himself) had to bring down the big beast. Therefore, in Temper, when it’s only Melissa and him on a hunting trip, they don’t go after elekai. Instead, […]
[…] around – seemingly forever – in hospital rooms. Small children are seen there, and in Together, Temper, and Fortune, among other places, including The […]
[…] nighttime lover, and she is also a doctor. However, during the temporal dislocations in Temper, she becomes a slave of the Terran Empire, and works as a field hand, picking tomatoes at a farm on […]
[…] As a successor character in Star Trek fan fiction, I needed someone who would have a head for business. That led directly to Neil, although he started off as a somewhat troubled teen, within the alternate timeline as played out in Temper. […]
[…] injections, which leave her dreamless and comatose. But in the alternate timeline brought about in Temper, the Mirror Polloria is temporarily freed, as Empress Hoshi has essentially opened up the […]
[…] that she would be the only slightly competent chef for the Empress Hoshi Sato. By the time of Temper, Erika is long […]
[…] Empress essentially gets him back by placing him under house arrest. In the alternate timelines in Temper, and in the correct timeline in He Stays a Stranger, it’s revealed Aidan stayed on as the […]
[…] is the main place where I write T’Pau. In Temper and in He Stays a Stranger, she is referenced as being someone who performs calculations and looks […]
[…] One thing this story did well was show just how hit and miss so many of the time travel missions should have been during the Wells series. It was also a chance to showcase an earlier Rick, one who hasn’t yet met the Becketts. Hence for him, the time frame for the story is pre-Temper. […]