Review – Where the Wind Comes Sweepin’ Down the Plain

Where the Wind Comes Sweepin’ Down the Plain

Where is it that the wind comes sweepin’ down the plain? Why, it’s Oklahoma, of course. Yet if stories about terrorism trigger you, you might want to back out now.

Background

To continue Richard Daniels and the Temporal Integrity Commission’s investigations in time, I decided the Perfections would prevent a truly horrific act, and then the commission would have to, sadly, put it back.

Barking Up the Muse Tree | jespah | Janet Gershen-Siegel | Where the Wind Comes Sweepin' Down the Plain

Where the Wind Comes Sweepin’ Down the Plain

9/11 was (and still is) too close in time, and felt wrong. But this event isn’t too much better, and I can understand if a reader finds it a distasteful topic for Star Trek fanfiction, still.

For anyone who does not know the musical, the title of the piece refers to Oklahoma! And so the story line can only be about one thing.

A lot of writers, when tackling a subject like this, focus on the Kennedy assassination. But I wanted something more contemporary. And this particular terrorist act is even worse, given the high number of lost innocents.

This is the last of the stories in the Complications subsection of the HG Wells timeline (the first part is Repairs; the last part is Unravelings).

Plot

Review – Where the Wind Comes Sweepin’ Down the Plain

As Rick recovers from meeting Milena (and falling for her), the Perfectionists, an opposing faction, pull off their most audacious act so far. But preventing the Oklahoma City bombing means that a number of people will live who aren’t supposed to. And this includes several preschoolers. Hence the timeline becomes horribly damaged.

At the same time, in an effort to distract musician time traveler HD Avery, the  Perfectionists avert a 1977 plane crash that killed half of the rock group Lynyrd Skynyrd.

And as a third piece of the temporal shenanigans puzzle, the  Perfections prevent the 1983 assassination of Benigno Aquino.

Temporal Issues

So as a result of these changes, the NX-01‘s pilot is not Travis Mayweather; it’s Shelby Pike. She works as the ship’s Botanist in the Prime Timeline. In this alternate, she and Tripp Tucker have a relationship, and Otra D’Angelo sees Pike pregnant with Tucker’s child.

Review – Where the Wind Comes Sweepin’ Down the Plain

Yet another temporal alteration concerns Wesley Crusher‘s death from a plague. So this causes the destruction of the Enterprise-D by a Borg cube because Jean-Luc Picard cannot stop playing a game and Robin Lefler cannot save the crew by herself.

Hence due to the ever-present Borg threat, the Federation obtains rather expensive help from Dawitan, Otra’s home world. The Federation pays tribute every year. However, the masses are kept appeased with generous daily rations of fortified wine.

Review – Where the Wind Comes Sweepin’ Down the Plain

But protesters, including Anthony Parker, break into the USS Saint Eligius in order to destroy the wine casks (they’re behaving a lot like real-life temperance advocate Carrie Nation).

However, in the largest of the crates they smash open, they find an emaciated Otra. She has been kept imprisoned by the Perfectionists. Upon the eventual restoration of the timeline, Otra ends up back prison but retains a phaser that Anthony has given her.

The end of the story also prods  a horribly distraught Tom Grant to confess his love to Eleanor Daniels.

Music

Story Postings

Rating

The story is Rated T.

Upshot

I liked putting this one together, as it ended up quite a puzzle. Daniel Beauchaine‘s actions have to be accounted for. In addition, I had to research and write dialogue for Timothy McVeigh and Terry Nichols. As a piece of the Complications subsection of these stories, the book lives up to the idea of being complicated all right. But it sometimes seems overly so.

Hence numerous strands, from the three temporal alterations, to all of the consequences, need correction. But it ends up a lot for a reader to follow, and I admit I probably rushed through this one too much.


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Posted by jespah in Fan fiction, Review, Times of the HG Wells series, 1 comment

Portrait of a Character – Jia Sulu

Portrait of a Character – Jia Sulu

Jia Sulu is a favorite.

Origins

First of all, I wanted a character who would be loyal and loving, and would leap into the BeckettMaddenDigiornoO’DayReed family without even looking.

Portrait of a Character – Jia Sulu

Faye Wong as Jia Sulu

Furthermore, I wanted someone to be with Malcolm at the very end of his life. Also, this person would outwardly seem to be a bit detached, as Malcolm is often portrayed in canon. But the connection would still be there, under the surface. However, the idea of detachment would be an illusion.

Finally, I wanted someone who would be one of the many living embodiments of just how different the Mirror Universe is from our own.  Because Jia’s father is Doug’s last male human kill in the mirror, a counterpart for Jia may or may not even be possible.

Portrayal

Jia is played by singer and actress Faye Wong. This beautiful woman is often described by the press as being a diva.

Personality

Kind to everyone, Jia is the extra daughter that the family never had. She supports Joss in everything, and is up for whatever he has to offer. He is her world.

Her most important moment in the series (so far) is that she is the only one present when Malcolm dies of old age, in Fortune.

Relationships

Joss Beckett

So there can never be anyone else for Jia apart from Jeremiah Logan Beckett. They are the kind of couple who meet as children and never, ever look at anyone else. There is never anyone else.

Mirror Universe

Jia cannot exist in the Mirror, as she is born in 2157. However her father, Geming, was killed by Doug in 2152. Plus she doesn’t even really have an analogue, like Marie Patrice and the other blood relative family members do.

Quote

“Father, when my own father died, my mother, she had the same visions. She would think he was out back clipping the hedges or at work. I guess it makes it easier.”

Upshot

So wherever Joss goes, Jia is sure to follow. And she’ll be back at some point, I’m sure.


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Posted by jespah in Fan fiction, In Between Days series, Portrait, 3 comments

Review – The Gift

Review – The Gift

Which gift matters to most?

Background

As a Star Trek fanfiction follow up to Pacing, I wanted Doug‘s second Christmas gift to Lili to be a huge surprise (as of the writing of this blog post, I have not yet written their first Christmas together).

Barking up the Muse Tree | Jespah | Janet Gershen-Siegel | In Between Days | The Gift

In Between Days

For Lili, this will be the culmination, as her dreams truly do come true and she gets what she’s always really needed, ever since she was nine years old – a home.

Plot

Review – The Gift

Lili is sleep-deprived and anxious, as Joss is still a young baby. She’s barely functional, like a lot of new parents are.

Doug hands her an article wrapped in paper, which she opens. Annoyed, she announces that her present is a wooden spatula. She then proceeds to place it into the holder with all of her other wooden spatulas. It seems the essence of a thoughtless, last-minute present. She is getting upset. Doug is going to have to salvage the situation.

Then Doug tells her that the spatula does not matter in terms of the present; instead,  it’s the paper it’s wrapped in.

That paper turns out to be his own crudely-drawn plans for their house.

And that house, eventually, becomes a possession of the Temporal Museum on Lafa II. Much like the family, it endures. Eleanor even gives tours of it.

Story Postings

Rating

The story is Rated K.

Upshot

I like this short story as a direct sequel to Pacing, as it fulfills the promise of the earlier piece. Both stories also prefigure a great deal of the In Between Days series, and begin to set the stage for more of the series. I like how it turned out.


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Posted by jespah in Fan fiction, In Between Days series, Review, 6 comments

Spotlight on Azezans in Star Trek Fan Fiction

Background

Azezans were an early invention. In fact, this wholly original species was one of the first ones I ever made.

Barking up the Muse Tree | jespah | Janet Gershen-Siegel | The Adventures of Porthos | Azezans

The Adventures of Porthos

For The Adventures of Porthos, I was still at a stage in my Star Trek fanfiction writing where I was mainly just looking at one-off characterizations and species of the week. The Azezans were a part of that.

Characteristics of Azezans

Yellow badge Star of David called "Judens...

Yellow badge Star of David called “Judenstern”. Part of the exhibition in the Jewish Museum Westphalia, Dorsten, Germany. The wording is the German word for Jew (Jude), written in mock-Hebrew script. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Peaceful to a fault, the Azezans allow another species, the Olathans, to run roughshod over them, to disastrous consequences and results. This vegan species is so peaceful that they don’t fight back when a far more powerful species comes in and takes over. The Olathans enslave them and have the Azezans self-select the Olathans’ next victims, in a sickening reminder of the Nazi Judenrat.

For physical characteristics, the only thing I gave them was purple skin. The skin, if sliced or bitten, is in lightening shades of purple. Other than that, I had no descriptions for them.

Enterprise’s Involvement

Normally, there would be no involvement whatsoever. Under the Prime Directive, it’s likely no one would visit such a system. This is because I never said whether they were Warp-capable. Instead, the Olathans secretly offer the Azezans as slave laborers. This is because of overpopulation on Azezi Prime.

Jonathan Archer watches the exchange between First Governor Siont (an Azezan) and Settlement Engineer Dar (who is secretly an Olathan), and determines from their body language that they don’t enjoy working together. As they are questioned about the work arrangement, Siont doesn’t appear to believe any of the platitudes he’s sprouting about cheerful, healthy workers. Whereas Dar is more than happy to talk profits.

Phlox enters with Porthos, in order to provide a quick break. Siont pets the animal, who seemingly without cause bites Dar in the ankle. The ruse discovered, Dar takes  what is very much like a cyanide capsule, also a reference to the Nazis.

Siont explains that to return with a dead Dar means that he and his entourage will be suspect. Archer, suspecting that there are more hidden Olathans, probably working as informants and Fifth Columnists, ends the matter with assuring that he will have humans sent as advisors with a number of hound dogs. The dogs, presumed to be primed to behave just like Porthos just has, should quickly rout the Olathans. It’s an imperfect and slow solution, but at least it’s a relatively peaceful one that the Azezans can condone.

Upshot

I have never written a sequel to this story, and it’s high time I did.


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Posted by jespah in Fan fiction, Spotlight, 2 comments

Portrait of a Character – Wesley Crusher

Portrait of a Character – Wesley Crusher

Wesley Crusher divides the fandom, or so it seems.

Origins

This character is, of course, canon to The Next Generation.

Barking Up the Muse Tree | jespah | Janet Gershen-Siegel | Wesley Crusher

Wesley Crusher

A lot of Star Trek fans dislike this character intensely, and see him as a male Mary Sue. I agree that the writing for this character was not the best.

But that’s what Star Trek fanfiction is for.

Portrayal

As in canon, Wesley is portrayed by actor Wil Wheaton. There is no one else, so far as I’m concerned, who can possibly play this character.

Personality

Shy and nervous, but smarter than everyone else in the room, Wesley has to learn to rein in his intelligence a bit. However, it’s not that he needs to dumb things down. Rather, it’s more that he’s just not getting a lot of social capital for always being the first one with the right answer. Hence he needs to step back and give others a chance, even though he knows that he can do better most of the time.

Relationships

Robin Lefler

This canon relationship is briefly referred to in Imprecision, when The Traveler asks about an earlier dream. Wesley admits he was dreaming about having sex with Robin, and that he sometimes regretted that not having happened in real life.

Lakeisha Warren

When Wes meets Lakeisha, it’s pretty close to love at first sight.

Portrait of a Character – Wesley Crusher

She’s playing the French horn in the Starfleet Academy band, which has been asked to play at Will Riker and Deanna Troi’s wedding.

But all Wes can think of, all he can see and hear, is the lovely dark-skinned girl with the dark brown eyes.

Yes, Lakeisha and Wes aren’t the same race.

They marry, and are together for the remainder of their lives. As an old grandfather, Wes talks about her in Crackerjack.

Mirror Universe

Portrait of a Character – Wesley Crusher

There are, so far as I am aware, no impediments to Wesley existing in the Mirror. Frankly, I’m surprised that no one seems to have explored this scenario in Star Trek official fiction and fan fiction has barely explored the idea.

I like the idea of him being less obsessed with duty, and see him as being a lot like, well, like Wil Wheaton himself has become. E. g. a guy who does some acting but is also a force for good in the geek world. Maybe a Mirror Wesley could be the kind of positive force for good that is lacking in that universe.

The idea intrigues, and I may look into it at some time.

Quote

“Are you telling me you wanna leave the Enterprise and all of that and just stay here? Is that it? Because if it is, well, do me a favor and help me get the Monongahela working again. I’ll leave you here, if that’s what you really want, and I’ll take my chances out there with that, that infrared pulse! And I’ll tell Captain Picard and the others that we got caught by an infrared pulse and you lost your freakin’ mind!”

Upshot

I like redeeming Wesley, and maybe, in some small way, I have. I’m not sure. If I can get on a roll again with the Barnstorming series, he’ll be seen again, with Lakeisha, as he embraces young adulthood, love, and the world of work, like many young people do.


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Posted by jespah in Fan fiction, Portrait, 3 comments

Review – The Conspiracy

Review – The Conspiracy

The Conspiracy was another instance of trying to surprise readers.

Background

In response to a Star Trek fanfiction prompt about the Seven Heavenly (Theological/Cardinal, too; the prompt was not about getting into the minutiae of theology) Virtues (which are the counterpart to the Seven Deadly Sins; I had already written about pride, in Before the Fall), I decided to tackle the somewhat obscure prudence for my next Star Trek fanfiction story.

Barking Up the Muse Tree | jespah | Janet Gershen-Siegel | Hall of Mirrors | The Conspiracy

Hall of Mirrors

To up the ante, I went with a setting where virtues would be all too rare – the Mirror Universe.

Plot

Review – The ConspiracyIt’s New Year’s Day of 2161.

And a few people meet, furtively. They are: Josh Rosen, Aidan MacKenzie, Andrew Miller, Chip Masterson, and Lucy Stone.  There’s one more member of the cabal, Francisco Ramirez, but he can’t get away, as José Torres has put Gary Hodgkins on to watch him.

While they would probably not mind killing Empress Hoshi, the cabal’s real thoughts are of escape. So as a prelude to Temper, Lucy and Chip mention that an attempt is going to be made to cross over to what we call the Prime Universe, as Hoshi wants another advanced ship. And they also mention that Andy will be sent to Vulcan to pick up slaves who can perform calculations, a neat prefiguring of Fortune and the Mirror Universe‘s Melissa Madden‘s death in a shuttle crash. Hence the story works to mesh those incidents together.

Story Postings

Rating

The story is Rated K.

Upshot

I used this story as a kind of bridge between Together and Temper, but on the Mirror side of things. And I think it works out well and helps to fill in some of the gaps in the Mirror Universe timeline.


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Posted by jespah in Fan fiction, Hall of Mirrors, In Between Days series, Review, 5 comments

Portrait of a Character – Rayna Montgomery

Portrait of a Character – Rayna Montgomery

Rayna Montgomery spoke to me.

Origins

A call was put out, on Trek United, for short stories for a newsletter. I was currently writing more basic fare such as More, More, More!

Barking Up the Muse Tree | jespah | Janet Gershen-Siegel | Freak School | Rayna Montgomery

Freak School

Then something turned in my head, and I came up with this odd character, a kind of Klingon Valley Girl.

Meet Rayna.

Portrayal

Amanda Seyfried as Rayna Montgomery

Amanda Seyfried as Rayna Montgomery

I like Amanda Seyfried for Rayna, particularly without heavy makeup.

But the truth is, Rayna could be played by a lot of young actresses.  Certainly Kaley Cuoco or Holly Marie Combs would have been fine in their earlier days.

Personality

Gawky and out of place, Rayna is as unsure of herself as many teenaged girls are. The difference is that Rayna, being half-Klingon, can do some serious damage if she becomes angered. Failing in school, she is taken out by her concerned parents and is moved from Connecticut to the Archer Academy on Oberon, where troubled hybrid teens can go as a kind of last stop before Juvenile Hall.

But Rayna is also smart, and her poor grades are more a reflection on her not fitting in than on any lack of ability. Once she gets to the Archer Academy, she begins to blossom, particularly in English. But she still can’t quite get the hang of advanced Math. But that’s okay; she’s about to get a tutor.

Relationships

Stellak

I haven’t decided whether this will actually go anywhere, but I like the idea of Rayna having a fellow in class who she can relate to, or at least strive for. Because not only does she want to fit in; she also wants to get the guy and, at the same time, defeat her arch-rival, Tellifa.

Mirror Universe

There are really no impediments to Rayna existing in the Mirror Universe.

Barking Up the Muse Tree | jespah | Janet Gershen-Siegel |  Amanda Seyfried as Rayna Montgomery (image is for educational purposes only)

Amanda Seyfried as Rayna Montgomery (image is for educational purposes only)

I like to think she’d be more graceful, and maybe even beautiful.

But she’d still be crafty.

Quote

“If I had more Klingon in me, I guess I’d be more intimidating, but most of the time I’m just a creampuff with cranial ridges. I swear I have never told anybody that before. Group is useless, but I feel I can at least mention it here.”

Upshot

I love this character but I really haven’t done enough with her.  After Freak School, she was mainly forgotten, which is a shame. I’ll have to find something to do with her one of these days.


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Posted by jespah in Fan fiction, Mixing It Up Collection, Portrait, 2 comments

Review – Pacing

Review – Pacing

Pacing gave me such a great idea. I immediately considered someone walking out a floor plan.

Review – Pacing – Background

As I began to put together Doug and Lili‘s life after Reversal, the question began to arise, namely, where would they live?

Barking up the Muse Tree | Jespah | Janet Gershen-Siegel | In Between Days | Pacing

In Between Days

I decided that I wanted them to have a home, which would be a house not too different from a house that a present-day couple would live in.

When a Star Trek fanfiction prompt about the natural world was put forward, it provided the perfect opportunity to show Doug planning this very important present, which culminates in the successor story, The Gift.

Plot

Review – Pacing

The short story begins with Doug waiting for a realtor, on Lafa II. He’s got an old-fashioned piece of paper and a pencil. But first he jogs up a little rise and likes the view. Sharp-eyed readers will recall how the rise fits in with both Temper and Fortune. However, the realtor, a native Calafan, tells him that the land up the rise is considerably more expensive than the land that Doug was initially considering. He decides to go with his original plan.

Doug then proceeds to sketch and measure, as well as he can,  the dimensions of the planned home. He’s not meant to be an engineer, artist, or architect, so the drawing is a crude one. All the while, he talks to himself, thinking out loud about how Lili would love a big kitchen and the view and the quiet remoteness of the area. He takes into account a room for the baby – Joss – and even a guest room. He wants everything to be perfect.

Story Postings

Rating

The story is Rated K.

Upshot

I love this little story, as it rather neatly prefigures a lot of the later In Between Days storyline, from the rise, to the location of the kitchen, to how Doug tries so hard to please Lili and, even, their financial concerns.


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Posted by jespah in Fan fiction, In Between Days series, 2 comments

Progress Report – August 2014

Progress Report – August 2014

August 2014 was productive.

Posted Works

Barking up the Muse Tree | Janet Gershen-Siegel | jespah | Quill | August 2014

I began the month in Star Trek fan fiction by continuing to add to, and then finishing, Entanglements on Fanfiction.net. And I then began to spin out The Three of Us there. Because these two stories were completed, Reflections Down a Corridor and Entanglements were imported into Fictionpad.

Also, I continued posting Flight of the Bluebird on the G and T Show Forums.

In addition, on Wattpad, I added Onions, Penicillin, Demotion, Letters from Home and Bribery to Before Days. To join a fanfiction drabble contest, I entered Worry.

I began the new round robin story on Ad Astra by posting Multiverse Mini. Like pretty much all of the round robins on the site, the storyline moves slowly and it might never be completed. I also contributed to The All-Stars. In response to a prompt about a worst nightmare, I wrote a story about Kevin Madden-Beckett, About Nine Months.

Milestones

My numbers continued to climb.  There are currently 18 works with 50 or more reviews. Four of those have 100 or more reviews. There are  over 100 stories with at least 1,000 reads. See the Stats page for individual read and review counts.

WIP Corner

I continued contributing to the wholly original story, The Polymer Beat, which is the first sequel to The Obolonk Murders. I worked on Time Out, which is the third story in the Barnstorming series.

Prep Work

I spent some time requesting a photomanipulation for my Klingons of Long Island character, Lukara of Hewlett, from the STPMA. That is all just a bit of silliness for the G and T Show.

This Month’s Productivity Killers

I began working as the Social Media Director of the G and T Show. My final project for Quinnipiac University was due during the first week of the month. I then began another class on the 25th, Theories of Communication.

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Posted by jespah in Fan fiction, Progress, 2 comments

Portrait of a Character – Neil Digiorno-Madden

Portrait of a Character – Neil Digiorno-Madden

Neil Digiorno-Madden helps keep a dynasty going.

Origins

As a successor character in Star Trek fan fiction, I needed someone who would have a head for business. That led directly to Neil, although he started off as a somewhat troubled teen, within the alternate timeline as played out in Temper.

Portrayal

I see Brendan Fraser for Neil. I like the actor’s affable charm.

Portrait of a Character – Neil Digiorno-Madden

I think I like him even better, now that he’s a bit heavier. He just seems more like a normal, regular person, which is more or less how I see Neil, who even refers to himself as the hippopotamus among the gazelles (his siblings).

Personality

Neil’s the guy with the head for business. He is also the only one of the BeckettO’DayReedDigiornoMadden offspring who cooks. Although he has no biological relationship with Lili whatsoever, he is her heir in this regard, and she sells him Reversal when she retires. Neil is also the only one who runs 5Ks and, while he’s slow and he finishes last, he does finish. After Melissa and Leonora’s death, Neil retains their Fep City apartment.

He is the only one of the five children who does not cross over to the Mirror Universe during Temper. Instead, bereft and lonely, he becomes troubled.

Relationships

Unlike his siblings, Neil embraces the Calafan ideal of both a day and a night relationship. He never marries, but he loves his two women deeply.

Ines Ramires

The daughter of Jenny and Francisco is Neil’s daytime woman and is as close to a wife as he ever has.  They have two children together, Jennifer Leonora, known as Jenny Lee, and Martin Kevin, who is named after the prematurely deceased Kevin Madden-Beckett and is also a direct ancestor of canon character Martin Madden.

Yinora

The daughter of Yimar, she is married to Fepwev, with whom she has three children.  Yinora and Neil, who are both named for Norri Digiorno, mainly meet in their dreams. However, Yinora and Ines are cordial with each other and live the Calafan ideal of a harmonious day and night in perfect alignment.

Theme Music

In Temper, he’s the only one of the principal characters who doesn’t get a theme!

Mirror Universe

Portrait of a Character – Neil Digiorno-Madden

A mirror counterpart is impossible for Neil. Instead, he has a mirror analogue, Arashi Sato, as they both have heads for business.

Quote

“Ha, the next time you eat at Reversal, I’ll be sending you a bill.”

Upshot

I loved giving Neil Digiorno-Madden a bit of a later life, where he runs his race and has his family close. He has all of the solid and dependable qualities of Doug without any of the violence. I like him, and he will return, I am certain of that.


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Posted by jespah in Fan fiction, Hall of Mirrors, In Between Days series, Portrait, Times of the HG Wells series, 5 comments