Category Archives: Review

Review – Third Worth More Than First

Review – Third Worth More Than First

Third Worth More Than First? Maybe so.
Third Worth More Than First

Background

Third Worth More Than First was a Daranaean story written by FalseBill when I ‘accidentally on purpose’ allowed others to play in my universes.

Plot

FalseBill went with the idea of a second, failed contact between humans and Daranaeans, and he decided it would end in a tragedy. In February of 2160, the Columbia makes second contact with the Daranaeans. And as a result, the hierarchy of Daranaean wives ends up costing that species a ship and everyone on board it. Because the third caste female has no say in what is going on, her wise counsel ends up being ignored. Much like slaves and other submissives, no one gives a damn about anything she has to say. And as a result, the Daranaeans all lose their lives.

Story Postings

Rating

The story is Rated K.

Upshot

Because the Daranaeans really have to be written in a particular fashion, I do not get too excited when anyone gets them ‘wrong’. After all, the hierarchy and the complexity of their relationships can prove daunting to even me. And I’m the one who created that species in the first place. Furthermore, the concept is sound, that a third caste female would be ignored and that could have tragic consequences. My main quibble is that it breaks my own fan fiction ‘canon’, seeing as the second contact technically comes from Take Back the Night.

However, if I see the story as taking place after Take Back the Night, then the timeline works out.  Again, the Daranaeans are really a particular species to write, and I am pleased that FalseBill took the chance and tried to write them.

In addition, do you like this page? Tweet it!


Finally, you find me on .

Review – The Golden Lady and the Knave

Review – The Golden Lady and the Knave

The Golden Lady and the Knave came about as a result of a poetry challenge on Wattpad.
The Golden Lady and the Knave

Background

First of all, the Golden Lady and the Knave was the poetry from Intolerance, stripped bare. I wanted to introduce people on Wattpad to the In Between Days series and a little poetry contest provided the incentive.

Plot

While the plot does not exist, the poetry adds some color and substance. However, without the background of who the participants are (Malcolm Reed and Dr. Pamela Hudson), the poetry, while lovely, falls kind of flat in places. Since the characters were not introduced, a curious reader cannot learn how dysfunctional their relationship ends up being, or why he writes what he does. And the reader cannot know how the damages Pamela suffers from, or why she closes herself off so very completely.

Story Postings

Rating

The story is Rated K.

Upshot

Because I do so love the poetry, the story does get something of a pass. After all, it was never truly meant to be a story without the additional trappings of the Intolerance novel. Furthermore, it does introduce readers to my poetry. However, Wattpad is a hard place to break into when it comes to fan fiction writing. The issue is the overabundance of non-Star Trek fan fiction on that site. Those other stories drown out pretty much anything Star Trek unless the reader makes it abundantly clear they are writing within the Kelvin timeline and, quite frankly, it’s really only Kirk slash which goes over (semi-)big. Kirk’s partner, inevitably, ends up as either Spock or McCoy.

And since I am not writing any of that, subtle poetry really gets lost.

In addition, do you like this page? Tweet it!


Finally, you find me on .

Review – The All-Stars

Review – The All-Stars

The All-Stars introduces the Barnstorming series.
The All-Stars

Background

First of all, the All-Stars was intended as the kickoff for the Barnstorming series. And that series would also hold Crackerjack and The Future Cat under its umbrella. Hence, I plotted it as a sprawling series. Except it suffered from an excess of plot and subplots and complications, even worse than the Times of the HG Wells series. And I should have known better! Seriously. Because the middle of the Wells series was hard for me to write, and some it drags a bit. Stories I had really thought about got short shrift. And the same ended up being true for Barnstorming.

Plot

It was a time for new beginnings, for a woman who had over half of her adult life stolen and for her cousin, a new job and new challenges. And this promised a new life for a young man with few plans and no real direction. Furthermore, it was a chance for three women to change their lives, and for fifty athletes to do something new. And there was a secret project by Section 31 that threatened to break a treaty and had the potential to open up a portal to another universe while someone out there – whose intentions were unknown – was trying to get in.

Story Postings

Rating

The story is Rated T.

Upshot

While the story resolves itself pretty well and the characters make sense, the story leads to a series which ends up going nowhere. Although I did write the immediate sequel, Play, that story has never been posted anywhere (if I end up really scraping the bottom of the barrel at Wattpad, then maybe I will haul it out; the same might end up as true for Fanfiction.net). And then the following stories never really get off the ground at all. A pity; the concept is a decent one but I just ran out of gas there.

In addition, do you like this page? Tweet it!


Finally, you find me on .

Review – Storm Clouds

Review – Storm Clouds

Storm Clouds gather and the multiverse experiences threats.
Storm Clouds

Background

First of all, Storm Clouds began as a round robin style story which never got to the finish line. However, I introduced Kevin O’Connor and Crystal Sherwood to a larger audience. And while they did not become beloved until right about the time of Multiverse II, at least readers would have some passing familiarity with them. Hence the story did serve a purpose although at the time it felt an awful lot like a failure. And it still, more or less, does. Since round robin stories, by definition, should sprawl and go on for a while, it stinks when a round robin collapses in short order. And one of the reasons, most likely, ended up being that no one other than me really knew what went on in my characters’ heads.

Plot

During the time period covered in You Mixed-Up Siciliano, Kevin O’Connor and Crystal Sherwood go to lunch but end up … elsewhere. This Round Robin story includes other participants.

Because Storm Clouds did not go that far, the plot did not emerge too forcefully or well. However, the characters did assemble, and I did get a chance to have Kevin mention Josie.

Story Postings

Rating

The story is Rated K.

Upshot

As a preliminary kind of story to the better round robin affair, Multiverse II, this story suffers because the characters I introduced had no history with the other writers. Kevin did get some love; I think people could relate to his loneliness and his bereavement. However, Crystal did not fare as well. Furthermore, they both paled considerably when compared to the wacky and complicated charms of Otra D’Angelo, Levi Cavendish, and Branch Borodin.

In addition, do you like this page? Tweet it!


Finally, you can find me on .

Review – Staying

Review – Staying

Staying came about because I wanted to showcase the Barnstorming series.

Staying

Background

First of all, Staying arose directly out of The All Stars and served as a prompt response. This happened in an effort to get readers interested in the longer story.

Plot

Because I never intended Staying as a stand alone story, the plot ends up being rather thin. Instead, it showcases Mack MacKenzie and Kent Hoberman in an intimate moment which perhaps never should have happened. Since I liked the idea of a traumatized woman crying after sex (I suppose I have a heart of stone; of course I just mean a character), I reused the idea in the wholly original novel, The Polymer Beat.

Furthermore, the intention pushed the narrative along so that Mack would not have trauma with her true love (still not written yet!), canon character Martin Madden.

Story Postings

Rating

The story is Rated T.

Upshot

While the story could have served as a decent introduction to the series, the readers really did not pick up on it. Read counts stayed low. And it can be tough to try to maintain and reinvent and continue a series where few if any people bother to read it. Hence the series is on hold and there are stories never even posted anywhere. If I pick it up again, I will need to finish those stories and that seems highly unlikely, given my schedule, my interest, and my desire to save my creativity for wholly original pursuits.

A pity, as I like Mack, Hobie, and Martin and their cohorts. They just came into my universe at the wrong time. Hence they may stay, forever (ish) in limbo. Sorry, characters!

In addition, do you like this page? Tweet it!


Finally, you can find me on .

Review – Soldiers’ Marriage Project

Review – Soldiers’ Marriage Project

Soldiers' Marriage Project
Soldiers’ Marriage Project, an early effort, showed me how well I can change the tone of a narrative.

Background

First of all, Soldiers’ Marriage Project came about so as to add a bit of romance to the Romulan war. The idea borrowed a lot from the standard ‘soldier going off to war’ narrative. As a result, a slight World War II vibe attaches to the piece.

Plot

Hence in Soldiers’ Marriage Project, a group of soldiers get married, all at the same time. My inspiration came from the old Unification Church mass weddings. As a result, this story marked the first appearance of Rona Moran, who plays a prominent role in Flight of the Bluebird. Because she helps to finance (and raise even more money for) this massive effort.

As for the soldiers mentioned by her in her report, neither of them make it to anywhere else in my fan fiction. I just wanted them to be archetypes, somewhat similar to how Rona herself treated the story line. Hence the couple don’t really have faces or descriptions (the above image mainly serves as a placeholder for this blog post).

Music

The music is Ain’t No Mountain High Enough by Marvin Gaye and Tammi Terrell.

Story Postings

Rating

The story is Rated K.

Upshot

While I like this story, I had virtually no control over the final product and the direction of the overall anthology. Hence, there could have been more done with it. Alas, such was not to be! However, that might not be so bad, as the couple remain a mystery and Rona comes across as her usual wacky yet ultimately extremely well meaning self. And that foreshadows later stories nicely.

In addition, do you like this page? Tweet it!


Finally, can find me on .

Review – Razor

Review – Razor

Razor
Razor, a tiny drabble, does not really need much of a review.

Background

First of all, Razor was written in response to a drabble prompt of the same name.

Plot

In addition, like the vast, vast majority of drabbles, Razor simply does not have much of a plot. Instead, it offers up a view of Tripp Tucker’s life and date with someone – probably a human, and certainly not T’Pol or even an alien guest – and a time at the movies. Hence this quick drabble shows a possible date between Tripp and a human woman, and it’s possibly Amanda Cole if they had gone further than one kiss. It was prompted on The Delphic Expanse;  the prompt word was the same as the title.

Real original, right?

However, it’s possible the prompt writer did not consider horror films when creating the prompt. So there’s that. Small comfort.

Yes, it’s possible to not enjoy your own work. I see no reason to expand on this one at all.

Story Postings

Rating

The story is Rated K.

Upshot

In addition, most drabbles suffer from length and depth issues, and this one provides no exception. Furthermore, the story breaks canon and does not even dovetail well with my own fan fiction timeline. So while it does fit into the In Between Days timeline, that is just barely the case. Hence I do not pretend to be much of a fan of it and I have only posted it one place for good reason.

In addition, do you like this page? Tweet it!


Finally, you can find me on .

Review – Prison Break

Review – Prison Break

Prison Break
Prison Break exists in the Dispatches from the Romulan War universe. Hence it dovetails well with In Between Days.

Background

First of all, I wrote Prison Break as a kind of homage to World War II prison break films such as The Great Escape. However, the Romulan War served as the backdrop.

Plot

Hence the concept behind Prison Break consisted of showcasing, from a journalist’s perspective, how some captured humans had gotten out of a Romulan prison. Therefore, this marked the first time I wrote about Berren Five, a location I have used in the HG Wells stories.

In addition, the original plan meant no one had survived an original attack. However, I convinced the series runner to allow for this kind of a different story. Therefore, the former prisoners detail everything from using ration packets to shore up tunnels to how they got rid of the dirt (a nod to The Great Escape, one of my favorite films, ever).

Story Postings

Rating

The story is Rated K.

Upshot

Because a prison escape story can feel rather uplifting, the intent also involved giving hope to the families and turn the series around a bit, as it had stagnated and had gotten rather negative. While that may be expected with war stories, it just seemed a tad too much, and nonstop. Hence the escape story and the reunions of the former POWs with their pleasantly surprised families had a purpose. It evoked the same sort of hope and positivity that can happen in the midst of any war.

In addition, do you like this page? Tweet it!


Finally, you can find me on .

Review – Oh My Darling

Review – Oh My Darling

Darling
Oh My Darling ended up being somewhat similar to Smells in plot and tone.

Background

Oh My Darling was a chance to return to Multiverse II and its improbable lovers, Rita Spinelli and Donald Janeway.

Plot

Since Multiverse II didn’t really end properly, I had nowhere to send these two characters. In addition, I really liked the idea of them, that they would almost be the flower growing in the desert or even amidst the radioactive rubble. Because Rita is rough and an ex-addict, and Donald had worked with Colonel Green, their love had an improbable air to it. Furthermore, while Sky (Rita’s daughter) had already made it into the story, the other children were barely hinted at. Hence I needed a place for them and wanted to revisit them and give them a kind of home.

Music

The music is, of course, the old standard, Clementine.

Story Postings

Rating

The story is Rated K.

Upshot

Aside from Detroit Rock City, A Single Step, and Hub of the Universe, I had not written too much in the pre-canon, pre-Enterprise time period. Hence the story helps to set up the future in ways that other stories of mine just can’t. Furthermore, almost like a phoenix (and the reference to the Phoenix, Zefram Cochrane‘s ship, is not accidental), Donnie and Rita rise from the ashes with this story.

The story even predates Lili and her family, although it does come after some interphased sections of some stories, such as Day of the Dead, Crackerjack, and, of course, Concord.

Hence I was happy to showcase a bit of their lives but also hope in the darkness. Because that’s why Sky Spinelli is really named Speranza Memoria, e. g. Hope and Memory.

In addition, do you like this page? Tweet it!


Finally, you can find me on .

Review – New Toy

Review – New Toy

New Toy is, unfortunately, a failed story.
New Toy

Background

First of all, New Toy never really had much of a plot. Because the concept behind it was to try to get people to donate to Ad Astra and give them more story if they did so. However, it sadly backfired. As a result, there is very little story and a lot of going to nowhere. While the concept is of interest, it never really got off the ground and now, I am certain, it never will.

Plot

Hence the main plot of New Toy, such as it was, consisted of a kind of enemy creating a brand new weapon. And here’s all I’ve got, sorry: In August of 3110, the Chilo try out a new temporal weapon that threatens the multiverse.

Therefore, Carmen has to send HD and Marisol. And so Boris threatens HD (hence HD’s song).

Because I was looking to get people to donate, any number of disparate extra plot elements were thrown. Meet the kitchen sink of short stories!

Yeah, that is just never, ever a good idea for plot development and story lines, okay?

Music

The music is Lena Lovich’s New Toy.

And HD also sings Joe Jackson’s Is She Really Going Out with Him?

Story Postings

Rating

The story is Rated K.

Upshot

While it might have been a good idea at the time, it just plain isn’t anymore. This one will (highly likely) never be finished. I have no plans to pick it back up again, and I have little doubt that no one is exactly clamoring for it these days.

Ah, well. They can’t all be good ones. Hey, at least I tried something new!

So do you like this page? Tweet it!


And you can find me on .